dissect

There is gut wrenching feeling in my stomach lately as I strive to figure out what God has in store for me.  I spend hours thinking of all the endless opportunities, plans and things that will come my way in 2008.  But it doesn't ever do anything for me except make me more anxious and confused.  I feel like I am trying to reduce an irreducible God, which is absolutely frivolous.  It is like cutting up a corpse to figure out what it is like to be human-sure, you'd end up with identifiable body parts in formaldehyde, but the wonder of pulsing human life will elude you.  Do you think you could find in the human brain clues to love or friendship, or what it means to be a child of God?  At times I feel like I am dissecting God, putting Him in jars, labeling His parts, breathing a sigh of relief because I have figured Him out, there is no more confusion and now God fits in my little box. 

God was never meant to be put into jars or explained by theological terms but to be a mystery that captivates our hearts.  I am discovering that following God and living in suspense of what the next day may bring is what is so fun about being in a relationship with Him.  I hope that we all can learn to let God be unexplainable and mysterious and learn to worship Him because of who He is rather than what He does or doesn't do for us.  Lay down our scalpels and Greek lexicons (maybe I am the only nerd who uses them) and spend some time  reflecting on God's beauty and awesome presence and let tomorrow worry about itself. 

Comments

[Chris]

I couldn't sleep after reading your blog... I was quite disturbed thinking about dissecting a human body... other than that I loved the post :) seriously, I love the entire metaphor it is so right on. see you in a few weeks... woohoo!!!

[Jessica]

This is really great, Brandon-- and so true. It's like, how do we try and figure this out enough to deal with it and live it without confining God with our finite minds? How do we try and get our mental arms around the greatness of Him without allowing those same arms to restrict our view of His greatness?